Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Gayest Ad Ever

I'm convinced that the makers of this Shake Weight video knew exactly who they were marketing to. It's got to be the gayest ad this side of Fire Island. Even without the sound, the phallic repetition of the exercise just kinda thrusts itself into your face. Ripped men holding a throbbing, shaking, skin-sliding cylinder right in front of their face? I'm not even gay and it's turning me on. (Not that there's anything wrong with that, as Seinfeld would say.)

The models groan and grimace as if they're having the sex of a lifetime with this contraption. After a slow motion segment that clearly evokes a porn money shot, they speed up the video. The model grimaces in exquisite pleasure/pain, bites his lip, then suddenly stops and says, "Whoo, that's it."

The text from the video (delivered in deep, tough, male voice) is further evidence of the clear homoerotic theme:
  • This is shake weight, FOR MEN.
  • And it's going to kick... your... BUTT.
  • ...add SIZE, definition, and strength...
  • Technology is all about PACKING megaperformance in less space, right?
  • The FASTER YOU SHAKE, the more INTENSE and challenging your workout.
  • Think you can HANDLE it?
Seriously, if this was not intended for a gay male audience, then it's also the funniest ad ever made.

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